The recent System of a Down stadium tour seems to be cursed or something. During their MetLife show in New Jersey, a man was caught masturbating in the stands and was forcibly removed from the venue by security and police. At Soldier Field in Chicago, a Reddit user who was at the show reported that someone had taken a dump on the pit floor, and while Limp Bizkit rapped about "the hot shit, the rock shit," that is not something that would put bounce in the mosh pit.
After the MetLife masturbator's downfall, we proposed what may have been his personal playlist, and because anything worth doing is doing twice - because hey, we are talking about number two here - here is what may have been playing in the Chi-Town Shitter's ride to the Soldier (Field) Side.
"Shit Life" by Dope
Well, this one is a bit obvious, isn't it? From the band's debut album Felons and Revolutionaries, this one is angsty, pissed off, and full of piss and vinegar. Perhaps the most pertinent line comes from the chorus:
"Irritated, frustrated, shit life
Won't hear a word I say"
Maybe this dude's dookie on the floor was a cry for help? Maybe they're just really hurting and just picked a bad way to express themselves. Something to be said about maladaptive behaviors and making your problems everyone else's problems, friend.
"Assdrop" by Sevendust
Originally, this song was known as "Rumble Fish," and we can assume that are wanton pooper had some rumbles in his guts before they, well, dropped their ass and did what they did. Here, the first lines of the second verse may be the most telling:
"Can I get a witness?
Can I get a witness from this rage?"
Again, this is someone who was blue in the face till they pooed all over the place.
"Tragedy" by Coal Chamber
From the band's second album Chamber Music, this was someone in need of a chamber pot, clearly. It's a shame that this incident was some folks' biggest takeaway from seeing System of a fucking Down, but I guess there's something to be said about a wish in one hand and shit in... well, you get the idea.
Like our previous cut, the first lines of the second verse tell the story:
"Unclean, undeniably, surely
How they stick to you like glue"
"Suffocate" by Cold
While this song is about realizing that a love interest faked everything about the relationship, this feels like something that our King/Queen/Monarch Shit would appreciate, particularly for the line "this cloud will always hover over me." While that person's bowels may have been voided, the scent is gonna linger for a while, disinfectant and other assorted cleaning products be damned.
"K@#0%!" by Korn
This song is just spewing profanity, with every four-letter word thrown at the wall to see what sticks. Jonathan Davis' line of "I have nothing to say" sums it up beautifully, as our runaway with the runs said what they needed to without saying anything at all. Those who had to witness and the subsequently dodge the wayward turd probably had plenty to say
"Take a Look Around" by Limp Bizkit
I can understand how some folks can pee behind a bush or in a corner, but how the hell does one take a dump in any sort of public space? I'd be nervous just keeping watch to make sure no one sees me pinching one off, even if I was in a secluded or closed-off area. The chilled-out groove of the verses might help to soothe the move, but the intense, head-nodding chorus might create the urgency needed to finish the job and get the hell out of Dodge before anyone notices.
"Poop Loser" by Mudvayne
Talk about a cry for help. The refrain is "You're a motherfucking piece of shit and you'll never amount to nothing." Poor bastard may have just been a self-hating individual who kept everything - and The Rock means everything - bottled up until one big release. Yes, this song is the intro to the demo EP, but I mean, sometimes you just gotta push it out till something gives.
"What Have I Done?" by Kittie
Is there such a thing as post-flush clarity? Maybe our stadium shitter felt bad about what they had done after they finished the job. The realization sets in, the dread of what may follow, the horror of what they just did to their body. As such, this doomier cut from Kittie's final pre-hiatus record I've Failed You says plenty about their demeanor after defecating in front of just everyone.
"Fillthee" by Otep
I mean. First verse sums this one up:
"Lying naked
Alone on the bathroom floor
Evacuating pain, fear....
No more"
I mean, I hope they didn't streak and shit in the same go, but I guess nothing is sacred these days.
"People = Shit" by Slipknot
And finally, we arrive at this, one of the angriest songs in existence. They don't call it ripping a grumpy for nothing, and there's gotta be some pent-up frustration felt by our concert coprophyte to just let the caboose loose in front of God and everyone. Guess our resident releaser was just putting in their two cents.
