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Is the New Taylor Swift Album Nu Metal? An Investigation

The hype has been deafening. Since Taylor Swift announced her 11th studio album The Tortured Poets Department at the Grammy's back in February, speculation has run rampant: Will this be her nu-metal album? It's a discussion that has consumed The Nu Metal Agenda offices on a daily basis - as we shared industry rumors about collaborations with Munky, sessions with Wes Borland, and Ross Robinson - and now, finally, as we gather around the stereo in my four bedroom Tribeca penthouse, we get to answer the public's burning question.

See below for our detailed track-by-track answer to the question on everybody's lips; has Taylor Swift made the nu-metal album of the year?

  1. Fortnight (feat. Post Malone)
  2. The Tortured Poets Department
  3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
    No again.
  4. Down Bad
    Again, no.
  5. So Long, London
  6. But Daddy I Love Him
    Definitely not.
  7. Fresh Out the Slammer
  8. Florida!!! (feat. Florence + the Machine)
    I was really holding out hope for this one but, alas, no.
  9. Guilty As Sin?
    Bottom of the ninth, still nothing.
  10. Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?
    HOLY SHIT YES! Oh, fuck, my music library shuffled that was actually “Click Click Boom.” No.
  11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)
    I Can Say It's Nu Metal (But It's Really Not)
  12. loml
    We're all pretty drunk now, Riv's crying, but still not a glimmer of nu-metal.
  13. I Can Do It With a Broken Heart
    But can you do it with turntables and drop tuning?? Apparently not...
  14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived
  15. The Alchemy
    Fighting with Josh for the aux cord now. He's trying to play Meteora. I'm hanging in there.
  16. Clara Bow
    Come on...
  17. All's Fair in Love and Poetry...

Well, guess not. Devastating. We'll get 'em next time, Nu Metal Agenda.